Good News! The Algos Say The US Economy ‘Is Doing Just Fine’
Ignore the large laser cannon, he’s just here to help!
Are You An Institutional Investor Who’s Worried That Someone Will Chop Off Your Hand And Use It To Access The Bitcoin Keys You’re Storing In The Side Of A Mountain? Pete Najarian Can Help!
“…said Clark, who noted the vault’s fingerprint scanners were equipped with a pulse reader to prevent amputated hands from being used.â€
Nuclear Football.
And that’s the week.
One Analyst Reminds ‘Old, Grizzled’ PMs That ‘We’re Late In The Cycle’ Is Not Research
Take that, “old, grizzled PMs.”
Iran Thinks Trump Has Secret Plan With ‘Some OPEC Members’ To Drive Up Oil Prices
I mean, I guess you never know.
Silicon Valley Venture Capitalist Spends 10 Minutes On Live Television Reinforcing Every Negative Stereotype About Silicon Valley Venture Capitalists
CNBC needs to have Tim Draper on every day.
New From Epsilon Theory: The Many Moods Of Macro
“At their core, most macro models are central banking models and macro managers are carry investors. They willingly tied themselves to success in predicting bank actions, and in so doing had a wonderful stretch of good returns and low correlations with stocks.”
Dick Cheney Thinks It’s About Time We Drop This Aversion To War Crimes Crap And Get Back To Torturing People
Because fuck human rights, I guess?
‘February Was As Significant As The 2007 Quant Meltdown’: Here’s What Goldman Expects For Volatility
Just buy the dip, Jerry. Everyone’s buying the dip.
BTP-Bund Spread Widens As Italy All Set To Try Populist Government, Because What Has Ever Gone Wrong With That?
But don’t get any ideas or Draghi will “rip your eyes out”.
CPI Misses As Investors Get Possible Reprieve From Inflation Jitters
Do you feel better?
More Policy Divergence: BOE On Hold, Signals ‘Limited’ Tightening
In case it isn’t clear enough, this just further underscores the policy divergence narrative.
Hedge Funds Didn’t Lose That Bet To Warren Buffett Because Passive Indices Will Always Beat Active Managers Over The Long Term But Because They Just Picked The Wrong Decade To Bet On
That’s the real reason Buffett’s declining a sequel and not because actuarial science says he’ll be dead by the time it ends.
‘It All Makes Sense When You Look At It Right’: The Dollar, Yields, Oil And The EM Bloodbath
“…you gotta like, stand back from it, you know”.
RBC’s Joseph Spak Writes Letter To Elon Musk That’s Just As ‘Boring’ And ‘Boneheaded’ As The Questions He Tried To Ask On The Tesla Call
Think of it like a reverse Dear Abby, where “Abby†is called “Elon†and via a collection of companies, “she†makes semi-autonomous (and seemingly combustible) electric cars, literal rocket ships, mass market flamethrowers and in the not-so-distant future, candy.
The Day After.
One day on…
Trader Asks: Emerging Market ‘Meltdown’ Or Much Ado About Nothing?
“The start of something? Or much ado about nothing?”
‘Who Knew Michael Cohen Was Leonardo da Vinci?’ Trump Lawyer Trolled As Novartis, AT&T Struggle To Explain Ties To Porn Star Slush Fund
Now, everyone listed in that document is scrambling around to try and explain exactly why they wired a shit load of money to a shell company that, among other things, was used to payoff a goddamn porn star who (allegedly) spanked the President of the United States with a magazine, before fucking him while watching Shark Week.
Did January 2018 Mark ‘Peak Retail Investors’?
Ahhh, retail investors.
Fired DE Shaw MD Shocked That Anyone Was Offended By His Mel Gibson Impression What With All The Orgies Raging In The Office
Daniel Michalow admits to being an asshole, but he also wants David Shaw to know that erryone at DE Shaw be f@ckin.
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