InfoWars founder, alt-Right Messiah, and fat tourist who fell asleep on the beach, got sunburned, and is now finding it painful to move around in his clothes, Alex Jones, is furious…
Now to be sure, Alex is always furious.
For example, most recently he was furious at Chobani yogurt, which he claimed was conspiring with George Soros to spread crime, tuberculosis and rape in Twin Falls County, Idaho.
He later apologized after Chobani sued him for defamation.
Late last year, he was furious at Comet Ping Pong for conspiring with Hillary Clinton and the DNC, who he said might be running a satanic child porn ring out of the basement of the D.C. pizza shop.
He later apologized for that too, after someone showed up at Comet Ping Pong (which, by the way, doesn’t even have a basement) with an assault rifle.
The other thing you should know about Alex is that his wife thinks he shouldn’t be around his children because… well… because he’s a lunatic.
Jones’ attorneys challenged that in court, claiming that in reality, Jones is a nice guy and that he’s just “playing a character” on his show.
That custody battle produced all kinds of classic Alex Jones moments including, but certainly not limited to…
- Jones claiming during a deposition that he couldn’t remember the names of his kids’ teachers because he “ate too much chili”
- Jones claiming that breakfast tacos only impair your memory if you have “7-8” of them
- Jones testifying that he has to smoke weed periodically “to monitor its strength” because George Soros is enhancing it in order to “brain damage a lot of people”
- Kelly Jones claiming Alex sometimes rips his clothes off during counseling sessions for no reason
You can read that whole story here.
Ok, so back to Alex being furious. Having begrudgingly come to terms with the fact that Soros and Chobani probably aren’t trying to bring down the state of Idaho, Jones has moved on to his next target. And it probably won’t surprise you that it’s Kathy Griffin. And also CNN.
In retaliation for Griffin’s fake Trump decapitation photo shoot, Alex has created a series of t-shirts featuring Griffin’s picture and the tagline “CNN Terrorist.”
That in and of itself wouldn’t be all that amusing. But what you, as an Alex Jones fan, are expected to do with these shirts certainly is.
Jones has devised a contest that will pay people who can somehow manage to get themselves on TV while wearing the shirts. Because InfoWars “wants you to win,” they’re not going to “create a bunch of boring rules.” Here’s how simple it is (from InfoWars official site):
- $1,000 prize for anyone who is seen on TV with a “œCNN is ISIS” t-shirt or sign.
- This contest is open for the next 30 days, or until $200,000 in prizes have been given out.
Of course you have to buy the shirts from Alex which are available from the InfoWars store right next to Jones’ “Tea Tree Shampoo”:
You should also note that if you, while wearing one of these shirts on television, “are heard to say Infowars.com”, Alex will give you $1,500 on top of the $1,000.
- $2,500 prize for anyone who is seen on TV with a “CNN is ISIS sign” and who also is heard to say, Infowars.com.
All of this, Alex says, is predicated on InfoWars “‘Bill Clinton is a Rapist’ operation” which Jones describes as “famous” and which he imagines was “one of the main pivot points in the [presidential] campaign.”
Finally, we would note that Alex is someone who would never pull a Kathy Griffin by suggesting he’d like to physically harm anyone…
Oh Lord… Please take this one away, the sooner the better would be preferable.
does this lunatic actually have an income? How come?
– Murphy
Thanks for the publicity H-burger. I bounce it back your way soon.