Jeff Gundlach Devastated After Discovering ‘Crass Hucksters’ Sold Him $1 Million In Fake Wine

Do you know what Jeff Gundlach hates more than anything in the whole, wide world?

“Fake news”, thats what.

In fact, Jeff hates “fake news” so damn much, that he decided to wage war on it, and his weapon of choice in what has turned into a truly epic struggle, is Twitter. Appropriately, he picked “@TruthGundlach” as his handle.

As regular readers are acutely aware, Jeff’s plunge into the great unknown that is the Twitterverse got off to a rather inauspicious start.

Gundlach joined Twitter in early May only to discover that the situation was immeasurably worse than he imagined.

The “Bond King” quickly found that the Twitterverse is inhabited by a veritable orgy of bad actors including, but certainly not limited to, rival bond fund managers who Jeff believes are engaged in a vast conspiracy to undermine him by creating fake Gundlach Twitter handles and unscrupulous trolls like @Jimmyjude13 who, despite Jeff’s protestations, think the only think to do in Buffalo is “jerk off.”

You can read more about Jeff’s crusade against “fake” Gundlach news here, but suffice to say the swamp hasn’t been drained yet, although he’s working on it.

Well, given Jeff’s aversion to all things “fake”, one can only begin to imagine how furious he was to discover that he was likely bamboozled by a California wine merchant who Gundlach claims sold him “at least” 67 bottles of fake Bordeaux.

jeff

Apparently, “The Truth” spent something like $1 million on the reds from Soutirage, but ultimately became “concerned” that its founders Chad Meyer, Aimee Meyer, Matthew Wilson and Ashley Wilson had pulled the proverbial wool over his eyes.

So naturally, Jeff set out uncover the “truth.”

According to a complaint filed Thursday in a California state court in Los Angeles, Jeff’s search for “truth” led him to spend God only knows how much on a “world-renowned expert” to “test” a 1928 Latour, a 1947 Cheval Blanc, and a magnum of 1961 Petrus.

Much to his chagrin, the “expert” concluded that Jeff had been duped.

Soutirage is nothing but a crass huckster!,” a distraught Gundlach exclaims in the court documents, seen by Reuters.

Of course anyone who knows the name Rudy Kurniawan knows this wouldn’t be the first time “crass hucksters” have pulled one over on ignorant rich people who, having run fresh out of ideas about how to spend their money, wake up one morning and decide they are sommeliers.

Undoubtedly, this story will only get more amusing as the lawsuit progresses, but our advice to Jeff would be this: stick to investing, because when it comes to tasting vintage reds, it is you sir, who are the “fake.”

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3 thoughts on “Jeff Gundlach Devastated After Discovering ‘Crass Hucksters’ Sold Him $1 Million In Fake Wine

  1. …shouldn’t that be medals … I mean a medal is usually made of metal … and gold is a metal … but an award is a medal … usually made of metal … which are usually gold … unless they are bronze or silver … and they are still medals …. and they are still all metals …. no wonder people say English is a hard language …

    – Murphy

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