Up until last November, when I almost died after my pancreas decided to go on strike citing onerous working conditions, I was long fine spirits. With leverage.
Since then, I’ve substituted caffeine for alcohol. That epochal shift has had a perceptible – no wait – a dramatic effect on global markets.
If you’re interested in a bit of Thursday evening satire, you can read about “the Heisenberg effect” here:
- US Beer Market Hit By Heisenberg Effect
- Heisenberg Effect Strikes Again As Coffee Demand Soars Most Since 2014
- Heisenberg Effect Hits Hard: Scotch, Cocktail Demand Plunge, Goldman Gives Up
One of the notes cited in the third post linked above looks at the product mix for Diageo. A chart from that analysis show that gin is among the worst performers in terms of value growth state-side:
(Goldman)
And while I don’t know the numbers for Canada (and I’m damn sure not going to spend this evening looking them up), what I do know is that Bombay recently rolled out a genius strategy in an apparent effort to “make gin great again” north of the border.
The idea was simple: Make that shit twice as strong.
Here’s CNN:
Canadian health authorities have launched a nationwide recall of Bombay Sapphire gin after bottles containing nearly double the advertised amount of alcohol were discovered.
The Canadian Food Inspection Agency said the bottles were found to contain 77% alcohol by volume rather than the typical 40%.
The company said that up to 6,000 Bombay Sapphire bottles may be affected. The 1.1 liter bottles were sold only in Canada.
“The over proof product inadvertently entered the bottling line during a short period of time — [up to] 45 minutes — when [workers] were switching from one bottling tank to another bottling tank,” the firm said.
Bacardi said the recall was launched after “an isolated consumer complaint and subsequent quality assurance checks.”
Clearly, there is only one question worth asking here, and that is: “who the fuck complains when they buy a bottle of liquor that’s twice as strong as it’s supposed to be?”
Actually there are two more questions: “how much are plane tickets to Canada right now, and how many bottles of Bombay Sapphire can you fit in a carry-on?”
