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kellyanne conway Trump

Kellyanne Conway Is “Not Inspector Gadget,” And Is Also “Not In The Job Of Having Evidence”

"I'm not Inspector Gadget and I don't believe people are using the microwave to spy on the Trump campaign. However, I have... I'm not in the job of having evidence."

The Trump administration is having a really – really – hard time coming to terms with the fact that when you run the country, you can’t just make sh*t up.

Or, I guess you can, but unlike when you’re not running the country, people are going to ask you to explain yourself when you say things that are exceptionally contentious, make momentous, seemingly unfounded allegations, or otherwise just act f*cking crazy.

Alas, the only member of the Trump team that seems to get this is Sean Spicer and that’s only because everyday he gets a reminder from a press corps that’s out to kill him.

One person who definitely does not get it, is Kellyanne Conway who Steve Bannon really should just ban from speaking publicly because every single time she opens her mouth, something even stupider than the last thing she said comes out.

Case in point: on Sunday Conway suggested that the “deep state” is using microwaves to spy on the Trump administration. You can read the full parody here, but this, in a nutshell, is what she said:

You can surveil someone through their phones, certainly through their television sets [and] microwaves turn into cameras. We know this is a fact of modern life.

Actually we didn’t “know” that was “a fact of modern life,” which is why it came as something of a surprise to everyone who isn’t Kellyanne Conway.

But the administration apparently hadn’t seen enough Conway for one day, so they let her loose again to explain herself to CNN and this is what she came up with:

Did you catch that? Let’s go over it one more time:

I’m not Inspector Gadget and I don’t believe people are using the microwave to spy on the Trump campaign. However, I have… I’m not in the job of having evidence.

You can write your own punchlines there, but let me just say this: “Yes, you are ‘in the job of having evidence’ because as noted above, when you run the country, you can’t just pull sh*t out of your ass.”

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1 comment on “Kellyanne Conway Is “Not Inspector Gadget,” And Is Also “Not In The Job Of Having Evidence”

  1. Curt Tyner%

    Seems to be a habit with most of the Orange/julius(as in Caesar) surrogates. This is BIGLY TIME folks as we watch the JUNIOR VARSITY Play at politics. Microwaves, “I’m not in the job of having evidence” what the fu*k does that even mean? PLEASSSSSSE! Once again WTF.

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