In Major Blow To Grizzly Bears’ Effort To Take Over America’s Schools, Betsy DeVos Is Confirmed As US Educator In Chief

Thanks, Mike Pence.

By the power vested in him by the state of Donald J. Trump, the honorable Mike Pence presiding has cast a historic tie breaking vote to confirm Betsy DeVos as the nation’s brand new Education Secretary.

As The New York Times (or, as Trump would call the paper, a “failing pile of garbage”) notes, this “was the first time that a vice president has been summoned to the Capitol to break a tie on a cabinet nomination.”

Congratulations are surely in order.

To be honest, you kind of have to suspect that if Betsy could go back in time, she would have declined this opportunity given the onslaught of bad press surrounding her confirmation hearing, but it’s too late for that now.

So America, meet your new educator in chief…

The Grizzly bear community did not immediately respond to faxed requests for comment.