A grateful world sang the praises of Donald Trump on Monday, after the FIFA Peace Prize recipient brought amity to the Mideast for a second time in nine months.
Among those most grateful to Trump for ending America’s three-and-a-half-month, four-week war with Iran: The man who started it.
“Many presidents have tried to make Peace with Iran, and all have failed before me,” Trump declared, patting himself on the back. “The Leaders of the Region have, for the first time, found a President who can help them achieve real Peace.”
Some regional governments might quibble with that characterization. Never before have Iranian drones and missiles so frequently breached their air space on the way to damaging critical infrastructure.
The Gulf monarchies might also harbor some resentment towards Trump for undermining their reputations as safe havens for international capital, to say nothing of his role in impeding the flow of regional cash “crops” to global markets.
But that’s all water under the bridge now. Says Trump. “I hereby fully authorize the toll-free opening of the Strait of Hormuz, and, simultaneously herewith, authorize the immediate removal of the United States Naval blockade,” he carried on, in one of two social media posts where the decorous language of monarchical edicts felt right at home alongside the juvenile proclamations of a child playing at king. “Ships of the World, start your engines. Let the oil flow!”
Go ahead. Roll your eyes. Then squeeze them shut in an incredulous wince. You won’t be alone in marveling at Trump’s latest feat of unfathomable callowness.
I can assure you everyone involved in these discussions, including many of his own aides and advisers, are no less astounded now, in 2026, a decade on from his rise to power, than they were during his first term, at Trump’s total obliviousness to the outward absurdity of his own theatrics.
As expected, the “deal” extends the ceasefire for 60 days, during which the two sides will debate the future of the Iranian nuclear program. In the meantime, the Strait will be passable.
Brent fell to a multi-month low and looked poised to slip below $80 for the first time since the onset of open hostilities.
Shehbaz Sharif told local lawmakers that Pakistan will host a signing ceremony for the US-Iran MOU on Friday in Geneva, where Iranian and American envoys, including JD Vance, may commence the first round of discussions aimed at achieving a final accord.
Frankly, it doesn’t sound like anything was resolved in the MOU, which appears to be little more than an agreement to “let the oil flow,” as Trump put it.
There was no evidence Monday to suggest the regime in Tehran made any concessions whatever regarding their nuclear or missile programs nor, for that matter, anything else.
Despite nonspecific claims to the contrary from both sides, the inescapable fact is that neither Hezbollah nor Israel is a party to the MOU. And the IDF’s still bombing Lebanon. That means this détente’s effectively hostage to the Israeli right.
During a half-hour phone call with The New York Times, Trump described Benjamin Netanyahu as “a very difficult guy. “To be honest with you, he should be very thankful to us,” Trump said. “Because if Iran had a nuclear weapon, Israel wouldn’t be around for two hours.”
I must be reading fake news from several sources that indicate that reserves have run so low that even the opening of straight will not resolve an impending supply and demand problem, which is about to become escalatory
I’ve read in multiple outlets that August is going to be awful.
Somehow, it’s still funny how he breaks something (e.g starting trade wars, actual wars, etc.) and then he praises himself for fixing it. He does it over and over again, but it’s still somehow funny.
Trump is a dead ringer for “President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho”.
Fact! I wish Terry Crews were doing more to troll Trump these days. He had some zingers during the first administration.
The only thing missing from the UFC fight were monster trucks and Trump firing an ostentatious machine gun into the air.
Here is another person grateful for all the damage done to Iran:
“Miriam Adelson’s Preserve America PAC is by far the biggest spender, pouring $215 million+ into U.S. presidential elections to help Trump”.
Trump may say it’s all about the oil, but as usual, it’s really all about the money. When something doesn’t make sense (starting the Iranian war), follow the money.
Trump’s mantra has always been ‘Me, my Money and I’. There’s an MOA about a pause because Trump desperately needs some “winning” and Iran needs money. If Bibi sits on his hands it will be a first.
Apparently she also was a major contributor to the successful effort to unseat Thomas Massie.
Our leader has spoken. All is well.
Worthless bull$hit. Blah, blah, blah MOU… wait a week, wait 60-days, still trying to decide who’s negotiating, still need to go to Congress, no Israel, etc… Thank goodness it got done before Monday’s market open. Image is everything in a world without substance.
I’ve work with too many sales execs who always say the deal is basically signed. Just a couple more details that need to go through legal. This is also how my kids negotiate. I’m haunted by bad faith negotiators no matter where I turn.
The principals will meet in Geneva on Friday, have a nice plate of chelo kebab, and then return to their respective corners for the next round.
I don’t have any reason to believe this but my suspicion is that this MOU + ceasefire are about 2 things. 1. Trump having a good birthday. 2. Iran playing in the World Cup. After #2 the bombings will resume.
This Week’s Schedule:
Monday: Trump declares peace with Iran and praises self.
Tuesday: Trump pressures new Fed Chair Warsh to cut interest rates (now that the war is over).
Wednesday: Trump castigates Fed for not lowering interest rates.
Thursday: Trump launches Truth Social missive at Kevin Warsh (and mentions replacing him.)
Friday: Formal signing of MOU in Geneva.
Saturday: Trump triumphantly returns to golf course.
Sunday: Israel launches new incursion into Lebanon.
So what is going to happen to the Iranium?
Same thing that happened to the check on gold at Fort Knox, the Greenland invasion, and the daringly rescued pilots shot down at the outset of the Iran War (not war) — it will disappear from the nation’s consciousness, drowned in a never ending stream of noise, friction, drama and new catastrophes. You know, MAGA.