Donald Trump Jr., Like A Nice Piece Of Laminate Flooring, Is ‘High Quality’

Donald Trump isn’t much of a wordsmith. We know that.

In fact, he’s the opposite. When it comes to butchering the English language, he’s a regular Leatherface.

But talking about your children is something different than talking about the media and you’d like to think that in a time of crisis, you can count on your parents to come up with something profound to say in your defense.

No such luck for Donald Trump Jr.

Here’s what the President came up with (as conveyed in a statement read by Sarah Huckabee Sanders) on Tuesday in defense of his son amid a whirlwind of controversy:

My son is a high quality person.

Yes, “high quality.”

Like a piece of equipment or say, some nice laminate:

Needless to say, Twitter is amused:

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