Wilbur Ross Marvels At Lack Of Protests In Saudi Arabia, Wooed By “Gigantic Bushels Of Dates”

Here’s something I thought I would never say:

God bless Becky Quick.

Or else God bless whoever is feeding her questions through her earpiece.

Because today on CNBC, Wilbur Ross — who was forced to quit his side job playing the Crypt Keeper when he became Trump’s Secretary of Commerce — decided to weigh in on all the social stability he witnessed first-hand in Riyadh.

And boy, oh boy did he reveal how fucking naive this administration is when it comes to Mideast politics. Just listen to this idiot:

Yes, so “fascinating” that there was “not a single hint of a protester anywhere.”

Unbelievable! “Not one guy with a bad placard.”

Mercifully, Becky Quick reminded him that running around in Riyadh with “bad placards” or doing anything that could otherwise incite any kind of social upheaval is a good way to get your fucking hand chopped off. Of course she put it more diplomatically.

But the point stands. And for Ross to then say “in theory that could be true” is the stupidest goddamn thing imaginable. That is, no Wilbur, there is no “in theory” here.

What Ross said is the rough equivalent of going to visit Pyongyang and then saying “the truly amazing thing about the whole experience was that the whole time we were there we didn’t see a single sign that anyone, anywhere isn’t happy with Kim’s regime.” And then going on to infer from that that North Koreans are a happy bunch with no qualms whatsoever about their situation.

Then, as you are undoubtedly already laughing about, Ross closes by explaining how he was presented with “two gigantic bushels of dates” on his way out of the country, a “gesture” which he describes as “pretty from the heart.”

Write your own jokes.

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