The Fed kept rates on hold Wednesday, as expected.

There was no drama around the decision.

Wait, I take that back. There were probably some Wall Street office pools betting on what word(s) Donald Trump would use in the course of deriding Jerome Powell. (“I’m in for $500 on ‘loser!'”)

But unless you count refreshing TruthSocial and laughing at Trump’s exasperation, the May FOMC wasn’t an eminently actionable event.

The outcome of this week’s policy deliberations was never in doubt. As discussed here on Sunday, Trump’s made it all but impossible for the Fed to deliver additional preemptive rate cuts.

For one thing, the administration’s pursuing suicidally high tariffs, which is to say levies so steep that impacted businesses have no choice but to pass along some of the costs to consumers.

In addition, openly threatening to fire Powell only incentives the Fed to resist calls for cuts. In simple terms: The louder Trump shouts, the harder it is for Powell to help him.

On the macro front, the US economy contracted during the first three months of 2025, but the Fed’s probably going to write that off to the import distortion. Indeed, the new statement said the economy’s still expanding “at a solid pace” despite “swings in net exports” which “affected the data” for Q1.

Although the quarterly core PCE readout overshot in the BEA’s advance GDP tally, the monthly breakdown for March suggested price pressures abated meaningfully. But that’s old news in the context of the tariff shock Trump delivered on April 2. The Committee on Wednesday again characterized inflation as “somewhat elevated.”

Plus, the April jobs report was robust, particularly under the circumstances (i.e., in the context of abysmal business sentiment and dour consumer moods), which reduces any sense of urgency Fed doves might’ve felt to start easing again. “The unemployment rate has stabilized at a low level,” the Committee said Wednesday. “Labor market conditions remain solid.”

The most notable change to the statement was the addition of the italicized portions in the passages below:

Uncertainty about the economic outlook has increased further. The Committee is attentive to the risks to both sides of its dual mandate and judges that the risks of higher unemployment and higher inflation have risen.

That’s a clear reference to the impact of tariffs and Trump’s policies in general. He’s going to hate it.

The forward guidance around rates was unchanged. The Fed will “carefully assess incoming data, the evolving outlook and the balance of risks” in determining the proper time for any adjustments to the policy rate.

What a bunch of losers. But what’s a patriot like Trump to do, right? Goddamn deep state.

Here’s hoping Alito and Thomas can convince three colleagues to throw out Humphrey’s Executor so Trump can get to work installing some people with real bona fides at the Fed. People like Stephen Moore. And Judy Shelton. And Larry Kudlow. And maybe Charles Payne.