Trump Delivers Wild CPAC Speech, Proclaims Himself Greatest President Of All Time

Well, Donald Trump just delivered what might very fairly be described as one of the most unhinged speeches the public has witnessed since his infamous “sons of bitches”/”rocket man” rant in Huntsville.

The President, speaking at the CPAC conference, skipped deftly (or maybe “deafly” is better) from talking point to talking point with no regard whatsoever for coherence, let alone decorum.

This was truly something to behold. By virtue of the sheer scope of topics covered and the incredible number of windmills tilted at, summarizing it is an exercise in abject futility.

 

Suffice to say he was in rare form, where that means ditching teleprompter Trump for a combination of campaign trail bombast and dictatorial balderdash with a sprinkle of Alzheimer’s thrown in for good measure.

Here are some of the bullet points from this spectacle (please just try and appreciate how objectively crazy it is for a President to say some of this shit, let alone cram it all into a single speech):

  • TRUMP SAYS HE’S PROVEN THAT HE’S A CONSERVATIVE
  • TRUMP: CAN’T ALLOW GOP TO `GET CLOBBERED’ IN 2018 MIDTERMS
  • TRUMP SAYS WILL NEVER ALLOW 2ND AMENDMENT TO BE TAKEN AWAY
  • TRUMP SAYS OBAMACARE BEING WIPED OUT PIECE-BY-PIECE
  • TRUMP BLAMES 1 GOP SENATOR FOR VOTING AGAINST OBAMACARE REPEAL
  • TRUMP SAYS U.S. HAS THE `WORST TRADE DEALS,’ CITES VIETNAM
  • TRUMP SAYS PARIS CLIMATE ACCORD WOULD HAVE BEEN DISASTER
  • TRUMP SAYS STOCK MARKET DID A LITTLE BIT OF A CORRECTION
  • TRUMP SAYS IRAN NUCLEAR DEAL WAS HORRIBLE
  • TRUMP TELLS CROWD, `DON’T WORRY, YOU’RE GETTING THE WALL’
  • TRUMP SAYS HAD A LOT OF WARNING ABOUT `SICK’ PARKLAND SHOOTER
  • TRUMP: MAKING SCHOOLS GUN-FREE ZONES PUTS KIDS IN MORE DANGER\
  • TRUMP SAYS CONCEALED-CARRY PERMIT NEEDED FOR SCHOOLS
  • TRUMP SAYS FLA. SCHOOL GUARD TURNED OUT TO BE NOT TOO GOOD
  • TRUMP SAYS IMMIGRATION LAWS `SO BAD,’ ALLOWS GANG MEMBERS IN
  • TRUMP SAYS DEMOCRATS `ALWAYS FIGHTING FOR THE CRIMINAL’
  • TRUMP SAYS CAN’T HAVE LARGE TRADE DEFICITS, BLAMES TRADE DEALS

As far as how he rates his first year in office, it should come as no surprise that according to Trump, Trump has been the greatest President of all time (and do note how he employs a classic Trump maneuver by saying “I won’t say me” as if he doesn’t realize that by saying that, he is effectively saying “me”):

 

And here he is getting the crowd to chant “lock her up” despite the fact that his associates are literally being indicted for high treason one by one and look like they’re set to flip on each other and then probably on him:

 

Again, it’s not entirely clear what the best route is when it comes to making fun of this. Like most of what he says these days, it is so insane that it eludes attempts to lampoon it. The English language is not a sufficient tool when it comes to communicating how wild this is.

I guess at the end of the day, it’s best to just channel Rex Tillerson: “The President speaks for himself, Chris.

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5 thoughts on “Trump Delivers Wild CPAC Speech, Proclaims Himself Greatest President Of All Time

  1. Yes H, there is a great example of “You just can’t make this shit up”

    When he got to the part of “it’s come full circle …” (referring to his imaginable crimes by Hillary) and making a half circle in the air with his little pointed finger — the beauty of that is that the other half of his little circle is all HIS former team that are caught and confessed with very real crimes and are lined up to bring him down and out of office and perhaps in jail before it is over.

    His repetitive and continuous commentary that he began during his campaign of 2016 is still today prominent in his podium projections…vietnam war, iran nuclear deal, obamacare, Paris climate accord, trade deficits – to stir his waning support and a few cheers to boost his self worth is disgusting and insane. So is he.

  2. Don’t worry your getting the wall. Phew! That’s is a relief. Folks you are witnessing the end of the empire and we deserve this completely crazy piece of sh*t.

    The theft of our country is almost complete as the uber rich buy the last threads of democracy before the final insult normalizing the Liar in Chief.

    The lie has been accepted like bribery is now considered a legislative idea. Our congress is bought and sold on a whim, either vote for the bill I wrote or I will just buy another senator for a 3 lousy million bucks and bingo, more guns.

    .

    Rome is definitely burning as Nero watches.

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