Donald Trump is done with Asia. He’s so over it.
He came, he saw, he subjected an entire region to nearly two weeks of abject buffoonery, and now he’s all set to get back to “business” stateside, where “business” means deep-sixing his entire agenda and undercutting everything the GOP has been working on in his absence.
Like any good President who has just returned from a grueling overseas jaunt, his top agenda item was to make a fool of himself on Twitter at 5:30 in the morning.
Presumably suffering from an acute case of jet lag, a delirious Trump promised his trip would produce “fruits” for “years to come” while simultaneously assuring America that according to his own assessment, the country “is respected again” in Asia:
About 10 minutes later, he vowed that Fox & Friends (or, as it’s known to most of America, state-sponsored propaganda), would be airing a full highlight reel of his adventures in the Far East before moving quickly to bemoan the fact that he was “forced” to watch CNN while in the Philippines, an experience he says only served to confirm his long-standing suspicion that it is “bad”, “FAKE”, and “Loser”:
Thankfully, Trump won’t be “forced” to watch CNN or any other TV for that matter now that he’s back home because as he explained to reporters aboard Air Force One last week, “when I’m in Washington or New York, I do not watch much television, primarily because of documents.” In case that wasn’t crystal, he clarified as follows: “I’m reading documents.”
Yes, he reads a lot of “documents.” And as he went on to explain in the same conversation, people who say otherwise “don’t know me” and those are “people with fake sources. You know, fake reporters.”