Nassim Taleb Drinks “Genghis Khan’s Champagne,” Eats A Horse, Becomes Grassland Warrior

Three weeks ago, Nassim Taleb was on his way to a self-imposed exile in Northern Phoenicia in order to work on the final draft of “Skin In The Game,” the fifth volume in an increasingly incoherent series of bestsellers called “the Incerto.”

Of course this is Taleb we’re talking about, so he couldn’t just go work on a book in Phoenicia. No, Taleb had to walk there, and according his Twitter feed, he “planted 30 olive trees” on the way.

Olives

We characterized that as the “9th labor of Taleb,” a reference to Hercules.

For those who don’t know Taleb, he’s a risk-managin‘, mathematizin‘, philosophizin‘, stone-liftin‘, best-seller-writin‘, Spanish-gypsy-huntin‘, Third-World-country-polluted-water-drinkin‘, madman.

In other words, he doesn’t just write books. He also teaches risk management, outsmarts markets when he feels like it, scribbles theorems and proofs on napkins, and makes youtube videos.

And that’s not all. Here’s a quick list of other things Taleb does when he’s not writing bestsellers, mathematizing, or making money:

  • lifts stones
  • goes spelunking in search of Spanish Gypsies
  • drinks water in Third World countries to strengthen his immune system
  • Twitter shames Scandinavians for talking too loud on their cell phones while riding the Metro North
  • does lots of deadlifts with Coach Rippetoe
  • makes fun of economists for not doing enough deadlifting
  • asks you to guess how much he can shoulder press and then tells you he doesn’t trust your estimates
  • thinks about whether he should head-load water to strengthen his bones

Basically, Taleb has become a standing joke to a whole lot of people, a cruelly ironic twist of his own making.

See, we all thought he was a genius initially but later we all discovered that he’s batshit crazy and suffers from what very well might be the most acute case of delusions of grandeur the world has ever seen.

Well, last night we decided to check back in on Nassim and he didn’t disappoint.

Apparently, Taleb is now a warrior of the grasslands – a soldier of the great savannas. 

Because he’s been drinking “fermented mare’s milk” which, he reminds you, was “Genghis Khan’s champagne!“:

Ghegis

But gettin’ all tanked up on Genghis’ horse juice doesn’t, in and of itself, make you a certified “Steppe fighter”.

No, for that you need to eat raw horse meat for dinner and chase it with a side of horse fat:

Steppe

So that was 13 hours ago.

By now, we imagine Taleb Khan has probably conquered most of Eurasia.

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khan

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