Apple To Buy Tesla, Netflix, Or Maybe Disney, Citi Imagines

As the Heisenberg crowd is acutely aware, we aren’t much for individual stock research.

We’re macro folks. We think about things at the asset class level.

That said, occasionally something comes along that catches our eye. But even then we won’t post it. Because again, we don’t generally give a shit.

But, when something strikes us as either i) particularly absurd or ii) just plain old funny, we’ll post it.

On Friday, we found something that meets both of those criteria.

Here’s Citi on how Steve Jobs will posthumously take over the world by acquiring Netflix or Tesla or maybe Disney.

There are even probabilities assigned.

Oh, and there’s a survey.


Via Citi

Slowing Growth and Too Much Cash

As Apple has become larger, the firm’s sales and EPS growth have slowed. But, in tandem, the firm has too much cash – nearly $250 billion – growing at $50 billion a year. This is a good problem to have.

Tax Reform May be a Catalyst

Historically, Apple has avoided repatriating cash to the US to avoid high taxation. As such, tax reform may allow Apple to put this cash to use. With over 90% of its cash sitting overseas, a one-time 10% repatriation tax would give Apple $220 billion for M&A or buybacks.

We Identified Seven Potential M&A Targets

We identified a handful of potential M&A targets. Three are media firms: Netflix, Disney and Hulu. Three are video game developers: Activision, Electronic Arts and Take-Two. And, one is an auto maker: Tesla. Each target confers some strategic benefit to Apple.



We’re going to go with “other” and write in “the moon.”



2 thoughts on “Apple To Buy Tesla, Netflix, Or Maybe Disney, Citi Imagines

  1. How about NASA? I think they have some good stuff, and a lot of it is very shiny! Imagine an Apple space shuttle! I think I have a future in marketing after my current gig as a patent clerk expires. /s

    In all seriousness, I could see Netflix being taken over by some other entity, but I have always marked Disney as the primary buyer. Who knows? Apple has never really been in content creation, have they? This would mark a venture outside their core competency, which would make me skeptical. Then again, when you have 250B sitting around, terms like ‘core competency’ probably don’t mean much. Tesla seems more like their style; a personality-driven enterprise that sells shiny objects to shiny people at a considerable markup. Sorry, I’ll go sit in the corner now…

  2. Moderately misinformed retail investor here.

    Am I missing something, or is this important and presumably well-paid-for analysis from Citi little more than the following methodology:

    1. Apple is very rich.

    2. Apple might want to spend its money on something one day.

    3. What are some high-profile names in Apple’s space?

    I mean honestly, this seems little removed from the “five things about X you never thought about before” filler I’d expect to find on one of those clickbait websites.

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